His and Her Health

My husband and myself are never in the mood at the same time. When he takes his sexual arousal pills, about four times a month, we have great sex that lasts for an hour or two, he's extremely horny, and for the life of me, I'm not. I'm horny when he's not on his pills, and he is when he takes them, only! Maybe, in the back of my mind, I'm angry at his need to take "something" to have sex with me, and if I don't give in to "his" needs, he gets angry at me, and if I don't give in once in a while, I wouldn't get the great sexual romps, fourplay etc. I'd only get excuse after excuse, or wham-bam-three-minute-man, maybe once a week. Help! Were both in our fourties

My dear friend. Help him. Turn him on. Read an erotic story to help yourself. You are being selfish to blame him. This is medical. It is nothing personal about you as a woman. It is life and aging. We all age. Only problem is women get horny as the man ages. This I have always said. I have changed my site a lot to help instead of blogging. On page 5 of the house above this post takes you to my site. Then go to talk and on page 5 go to How I Got My Man Hard Again Off Viagra. I have changed many men with this. I get letters from women telling me. Try it. My husband is great from it. Please this is nothing about you but help him all you can. Never get angry. Never put him down. Get sexy. Take care, Caroline

Drugs like viagra can't create desire - they only create the ability to act on desire. All the drugs in the world won't make him want you if he doesn't. He wants you without it. He just has a hard time doing something about it without the drug and men who are afraid of failing in the act often act like they are not in the mood - to avoid the worry about their performance. I know this from personal experience. Please don't blame him for needing it.

That said, if he's just taking it without checking to see if it's a good time for you and just expects you to hop to it, then that's something you need to talk about. Let him know you understand he needs it but that he should let you know before he takes the pill so he doesn't waste one by taking it when you're not prepared to participate in the outcome.

I think sometimes a man that has to take the pill suffers from this if it hits him early in life. His confidence sometimes is shattered. It should not be but it is. This is definitely something they have to discuss. She could also help in reading erotic stories or anything to turn herself on. I truly believe as a woman ages her sexual needs grow stronger and more demanding as they need fulfilling. This is something she must talk with him about. The pill is wonderful and I did not mean to talk her out of but point out ways to turn him on without it. If she could together with the pill this could add to sexual enjoyment for both of them. She should tell him that she needs pleasuring in between with great oral sex or the sexual pleasuring of her choice to hold her over until he again takes the pill. For many women once a week is not enough for sexual gratification.

Communication, my dear. When you're feeling frisky suggest to him, with a little wink and sly smile, that he take one of "his sexual arousal pills". (I'm assuming you're talking about Viagra, Cialis or Levitra.) An hour later you'll both be ready. Meanwhile you can take a bath, light some candles, and slip into something comfortable and sexy.

As has been stated, if these are the pills you're talking about, they're NOT sexual arousal pills at all. They work great for many men who have vascular problems that prevent sustained erections, but they do nothing to enhance desire.

Good luck!