His and Her Health

I am a 27 year old house wife and mother of 3. My problem is I have no sexual desire.I had a complete hysderctomy at age 25 and have complety lost my sexual desire.there is no feelings in my brest nor my vagina.My husband is very supportive of this matter.Still I do not even fell like a woman anymore.I have talked to my doctor about this matter , his advice was I must be depressed. I dont think I am depressed. I need help and dont no where to get it anymore PLEASE HELP.

Barbie, first welcome to the board. <P>A few questiions, which should help posters here give you some advice:<P>You say you've had a complete hyst. Was it due to medical issues, and if so, would you mind sharing those issues with us? <P>Also, assuming that by "complete" you mean that you have no ovaries left, are you on hormone therapy--testosterone and estrogen? <P>Does your doctor have any reason to believe you are depressed, aside from your sexual issues?<P>Are you on any medications at all? If so, what and for how long?<P>What was your sexual desire and sensation like before the hyst? <P>Is the hyst definitely when you lost your desire and sensation?<P>Sexual issues aside, how is your relationship with your husband?<P>Do you and your husband get enough time for yourselves, without the children around?<P>Do you excersize (though I can imagine that runnign after 3 kids is probably plenty of excersize), eat well, and get enough rest and water?<P>Do you drink regularly, smoke, or ingest a lot of caffiene?<P>Did you have desire after the birth of your children? How old are they?<P>I know this sounds like a lot of questions, and it can be a hard thing to talk about. Hopefully, you can feel comfortable enough here to talk honestly and openly on these rather personal subjects. I am sure some other posters will have other questions, and you may also want to read prior posts (you can use the search function to find other related posts about hysts) for more information and ideas.

SORRY ABOUT LACK OF INFO.IM NEW AT THIS. I HAD A COMPLETE HYSTERCTOMY 11/14/01.I AM TAKING PRIMREN 2.5 AND PAXIL CR 25mg.THE REASON FOR MY HYST. WAS INDO. AFTER MY FIRST CHILD I HAD A LITTLE TROUBLE WITH MY DESIRE, BUT IT DID PICK BACK UP.SAME THING AFTER MY SECOND CHILD.I ALSO HAD A TUBLE AFTER MY SECOND HE WAS BORN MARCH 2000 AND MY TUBLE WAS APRIL2000.THEN I STARTED HAVING SEVER PAIN AND FOUND I HAD INDO. MY DESIRE AND SENCATION LEFT SHORTLEY AFTER MY HYST. I WOULD SAY THIS LAST YEAR HAS BEEN THE WORST. MY HUSBAND FIRST THOUGHT I DID NOT LOVE HIM ANYMORE OR WAS NOT ATTRICED TO HIM. I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO HIM IT WAS NOT HIM IT WAS ME. MY HUSBAND HAS DELT WITH IT VERRY SUPPORTIVE. MY HUSBAND AND I HAVE A GREAT RELATIONSHIP.I HAVE NO SENCATION IN MY BREST OR VIGANIA.IM TO THE END OF MY ROPE AND DO NOT NO WHAT TO DO ANYMORE.I AM TAKING PAXILCR FOR MY DEPRESSION . I FIND MYSELF NOT WANTING TO BE AROUND PEOPLE OR IN EMBEARISON SISTUATIONS. I DO EXERCISE BUT NOT LIKE I DID A YEAR AGO . PLEASE IF THIS CAN BE FIXED PLEASE LET ME NO WHAT TO DO AND WHERE I NEED TO GO FOR HELP. I LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN AND HAVE NOT FOUND A DOCTOR YET THAT COULD HELP ME WITH THIS MATTER ANY ADVICE WOULD BE GREAT AND I THINK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS AND REPLY..

Barbie,<P>Thank you for your reply. One very important question you didn't answer is are you taking hormonal therapy? This can be very important after a full hyst, and can have a tremendous impact on your sexual (as well as other) functions. If you are taking only estrogen, you should consider asking your doctor to test your free testosterone levels. Losing your ovaries impacts the bodily production of this hormone, which is one you absolutely need some of--not just for sex, but for other reasons like bone mass and lean muscle. If you're not taking either, go see another doctor. <P>Paxil itself has a very high rate of sexual side effects, including lower libido. This may be adding to your problem. Would you and your doctor (though it really sounds like you need to get a new doctor, if possible) consider switching to Wellbutrin if it is medically okay for you? Wellbutrin has a much lower rate of sexual side effects than Paxil, and may either help or at least not exacerbate the problems you're having. How long have you been on the Paxil? If you've been on it for some time, and you're still depressed, either the medication isn't right for you or your dosage needs to be adjusted. If you are depressed because of your situation, and not becuase of a chemical imbalance, I would highly recommend trying to find other ways to deal with the depression. Paxil and drugs like it weren't meant for short-term or situational depression. They're meant to treat people with chemical imbalances in their brains that cause depression.You may start with trying to excersize more. I realize this can be very tough with 3 children, but excersize is a proven way to help combat depression. It can also help with sensation and libido.<P>It is wonderful that your husband is being supportive--this can be a difficult time for parnters, as well as for those experiencing the difficulty. <P>I am sure other posters will have some other advice to off, as well. *big hugs*

WHEN YOU SAY HORMONAL THERPY WHAT DO YOU MEAN .IM TAKING PRIMREN IS THAT HORMONAL THERPY.THATS ALL IM TAKING OR DOING. I HAVE BEEN TAKING PAXIL FOR 3 MONTHS BECAUSE MY DOCTOR BELIVES I HAVE AGRAPHOBIA.I LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN AND GO TO HE BEST DOCTOR IN TOWN.I WENT TO ONE OF THE 2 OBGYN WE HAVE IN THIS TOWN AND HE WAS VERY UNPERFISONAL.I REPORTED HIM TO THE MEDICAL BOARD FOR THE THINGS HE DID AND SAID TO ME IN HIS OFFICE. HE MADE ME NEVER WANT TO SEE ANOTHER DOCTOR AGAIN.

Yes Premarin is hormonal therapy. It is estrogin and progestin. That is good. However, it may be binding your testosterone (if you even have any, since you have no ovaries to produce it), which you need for other bodily functions, including sexual issues. It is not uncommon for women who've had full hysts to also recieve testosterone therapy. If you doctor isn't willing to discuss this with you, you should consider seeing another doctor--even if it means leaving town. Your physician should be monitoring your estrogen levels regularly, as well, and making sure you are on the lowest possible dose of your HRT that works for you. This reduces the associated risk of breast cancer.<P>You might start by really educating yourself about your body and the medications your are on, and why you are on them. It sounds as though you aren't sure about these things, and going to see any doctor without being fully informed is simply asking for trouble, and you should never take any medication without knowing what it is and why you are taking it. Do a search on the web about Premarin, and/or read the inserts that come with your prescription. Do the same with your Paxil.<P>Also, unless your doctor is a psychiatrist, he or she should not be attempting to diagnose psychatric illnesses. You should consult a psychiatrist, who can correctly diagnose you, and perscribe a comprehensive treatment plan if one is needed. Phobias are often successfully treated with FDA approved methods such as biofeedback and behavioral therapy (sometimes in conjunction with medications) to eventually alleviate the phobia. This would mean you could, potentially, solve the problem instead of simply treating the symptoms with drugs for the rest of your life. Paxil is not the best drug for many things, or the right drug for all people. There are several alternatives, and one may be much better in your case than another. Do not, however, take yourself off Paxil. You need to be under professional care when and if that is necessary.<P>I am sorry to hear of the treatment you rec'd at the hands of your local gyn. You may want to consider making an appointment with a female gyn in another town. Seeing someone of the same gender may go a long way to alleviate some of your discomfort. Until you are ready to see another doctor or openly discuss these things with yours and insist on proper care, however, it may be difficult for the posters here to help you very much. I do understand, having been through some professional abuse myself, how difficult this can be; but, you'll need to find the inner strength to do this for yourself. Hormonal tests are definitely warranted in your case (my gyn, for example, was on testosterone for quite some time after her own full hyst), and you'll need a doctor you are comfortable with to help interpret the results and decide if more treatment is necessary. You also need a doctor who will take your complaints seriously.<P>I would highly recommend you read the book: "For Women Only," by the Bermans sisters. It would be a great place to start your education of your own body, and how surgery and other things can affect sexuality both physically and emotionally. It sounds as though you really need to take the step of becoming an informed patient. There are some other books that should be helpful for you, as well, that I hope some other posters will chime in with. <P>In summary, you need to:<BR>-Educate yourself about your body and what can affect your sexual function (surgery, hormone issues, psyhological components, etc.).<BR>-Educate yourself about the medications you are on, what they do, side effects, and why you are on them.<BR>-Make an appointment with a physician outside your hometown, preferably a female.<BR>--Make an appointment with a LICENSED PSYCHOIATRIST(not a psychologist--they can't perscribe medications, which you may or may not need) to determine a correct diagnosis and course of treatment.<P>You can, if you like, email me and I will be happy to send you some additional links you may find interesting. We can't post links here.<P><BR>[This message has been edited by dona1 (edited 21 November 2003).]<p>[This message has been edited by dona1 (edited 21 November 2003).]