His and Her Health

I am a 66 year old woman who has gone through her entire life not being able to tolerate anyone touching her clit in any way. I can not even stand touching my clit. When a male touches my clit it is so negative that it immediately kills any level of intimate mood we have and I totally such down sexually. In addition the only way that I can even think about getting close to an orgasim is if I am on top. My real issue, however, is not being able to allow my sex partner to perform what I have come to understand is normal sexual forplay by stimulating my clit. And to be honest, at this stage in my life I am not necessarily looking for a fix, but rather information to bring me to some level of understanding of my condition. And yes, my situation has eventually been damaging to the point of wrecking every relationship that I have ever had in my life. Consiquently, any information which will help me understand why I am the way I am will be most appreciated.

Thanks,

Fly

rcrfly, welcome to the forum. Have you ever been examined by a gynecologist for your hypersensitive clitoris? The doctor can diagnose and treat with an exam.It may not be just your clitoris envolved.

Yes, I have been examined by an OB/GYNs. The only response I have ever gotten is, "I do not know". From your question it sounds as though I have gone to uniformed physicians. This strikes me as strange as I thought that an OB/GYN specialzed in issues such as mine.

Dear Moderator: Are you telling me that I have had to go through my entire adult life with this hypersensitive clit issue only because I was not lucky enough to happen across an OB/GYN that had the necessary knowledge in order to help me with this relationship wrecking as well as horrible psychological burden? Do you have any idea what it is like to be told, "you are just not a normal woman"? Do you have any idea what it is like to have to tell a man before he is intimate with you "just do not touch my vigina?" At least I think I can see that there may be a possible glimmer of hope for me in your brief response.

Unfortunately, not all Ob/Gyns are "specialized." Yes they now do the check ups, pap smears, cervical and breast cancer screenings....when you approach most with sexual discomfort, most are unaware on how to approach solving this problem. I have seen way to many patients in my PT clinic whom have had evals by doctors and are told to have a glass of wine to "relax." Not quite appropriate I think.
Perhaps there is increased nerve sensitivity (clitoral branch).
A question I was wondering is: is it only during touch that the hypersensitivity occurs?

<small>[ 08-27-2009, 09:16 AM: Message edited by: Moderator ]</small>

Niva: Ah yes, the ole "have a glass of wine, relax, and flow with the mood" medical recommendation". To this I will say no more. Yes, only during touch does the hypersensitivity occur. Without a touch I go through a regular day and it is not an issue. Only when I am touched near the clit. And if it is helpful to your understanding I can not even touch the area myself and it not cause an incredible negative sensation. So much so that I have modified the way in which I clean my vaginal area to insure that I do not touch myself wrong. I can have intercourse with it not being an issue. Of course I also control angles of contact during intercourse to insure that the area is not rubbed or pressed in any way. Finally, you have no idea how much relief I feel by just having someone respond to me like I am not some type of crazy on this subject. Thank you so very much.

Do you have any other pertinent history? Any bladder or bowel issues? Any surgeries (abdominal, pelvic, rectal, vaginal)? Any pregnancies? If yes: any tearing or episiotomy? Any history of fissures?
I am asking these types of questions to see if there may be some underlying soft tissue or connective tissue restrictions which may lead to increased nerve sensitivity.

Any trauma like biking accident?

No bladder or bowel issues. Not surgeries. Two pregnancies. No fissures. Yes to episiotomies but as my current condition existed prior to the pregnancies....... Biking Riding accident yes. When I was between 11 to 13 I was riding a boy's bike, crashed into a tree, was pitched forward and my vagina landed on the cross bar of the frame of the bike that runs from under the seat to the front of the bike. I was incredibly slender (toothpick skinny) as a child so had a minimal amount of tissue in my vaginal area to cushion the blow. I can still remember that it hurt a lot. Can not remember if my current condition existed before the bike crash. Given that I was so young my vaginal area was not something that I explored at that time.

so there may be some scarring and decreased connective tissue mobility. Where do you live? You can check womenshealthapta.org for a pelvic floor PT in your area; perhaps they can see if these issues exist.

<small>[ 08-27-2009, 09:37 PM: Message edited by: Moderator ]</small>

I live in the Dallas-Ft Worth Texas area. So tell me, what in the world is a pelvic floor PT? And what exactly do they do? Or, maybe a more important question is whether or not there is any corrective action can be taken if I do have access to one of these people and something is found. I understand, nobody can say for sure without performing an examination. But are we talking a 1 in a million shot here, or are we talking more reasonable odds? Please understand. I have learned to live with this condition for 45+ years. Before I let my head wander off into "what if land" I would like to have some idea of the odds of really being able to change my condition, or the resultant disappointment that I will have to deal with if I can not.

I also fell on the bar of a bike when I was little and remembering it hurting so bad. My clitoris was hypersensitive too as an adult before I was diagnosed with Vulvodynia. with me, it happened all the time and I thought I'd go nuts. I was first diagnosed with Lichen Sclerosis and used Testosterone ointment and then years later told I didn't have L.S. and was diagnosed with Vulvar Vestibulits. That hypersensitivity went away as suddenly as it appeared. I'm 59.

Sunshine: So good to hear from you and the information that you have shared. In reading what you have provided I noticed that you say you were diagnosed with Vulvodynia and Vulvar Vestibulits, the later of which resulted in your hypersensitivity suddenly going away. If you would please share with me what was done medically, physically, or whatever after your Vulvar Vestibulits diagnosis in order to cause the hypersensitivity to subside. Much thanks for the contribution of your information.

Pelvic floor physical therapists specialize in issues such as pelvic pain, incontinence, sexual dysfunction and painful intercourse, etc.. The website I gave you in a previous reply should answer this even more thoroughly or you can also go to my website which talks about it in greater detail. You can be evaluated by a PT who deals with these types of issues and if there is a musculoskeletal issue, possible alignment issues, weakness, tightness, etc. then yes there is a good chance of some or all relief!

I use Estrace cream topically; a pea sized amount twice a day. I believe that the Estrace has helped me more than anything else. In my case, my skin was very thin and the cream thickened it. I also apply emu oil sometimes for dryness and irritation. Once a week, I apply Clobetasol ointment. I still have some irritation, but not nearly as bad as years ago when I would sit in the bathtub and cry b/c the burning was so bad and constant. Aveeno baths are very soothing and when nothing else works, I use an icepack and/or Lidocaine ointment. What a way to live, eh?

Estrace cream helps when there is a hormone imbalance, or thinning skin, as in 'Sunshine's' case. clitoral sensitivity typically is more of a nerve and muscular problem. seeking a pelvic floor physical therapist will guide you if it is a nerve, muscular or connective tissue problem.