His and Her Health

I'm in my mid-30's and have happily found that my libido has increased over the last couple of years. I've been exercising more over the past several months, and my body is improving, and I feel sexier.

Problem is, I find myself fantasizing about men other than my husband. No one in particular, and not about true emotional intimacy, but just thoughts about casual sex. I've never been with any man but my husband, and while I cherish this in many ways, sometimes I feel curious about what it would have been like with other men (again, no one in particular).

I think this is normal, and I'd never cheat, but worry that all this fantasizing is a signal that something's not right or could be better between me and my husband. We have sex pretty regularly, and it's usually quite good. He just doesn't maintain as strong an erection as he used to... age and a bit of weight gain, I guess. It's not a big deal though, as he makes every effort to please me. He is in his early 40's, and expresses fears that I'll leave him for someone younger (not going to happen! I love the man, and he is a wonderful husband and father).

He's finally going for a full physical, where he says he'll discuss the "weak" erections. I'm worried that med. like Viagra will have unwanted side effects, and wondering if there's something natural he can do.

Thanks for any advice.

Don't sweat it, You're just curious about other situations you could have and I think it's because your libido is high. As for your husband, I think he sees that being healthy is good sex and wants to achieve what you have. I suggest you and him read Zane Blues posts because it works for men as well as women.

I wouldn't worry about it. People have all kinds of fantasies they would never act on. It is just a result of an active sex drive.

You're is still fairly young. He'll probably find that his erections return if he exercises and loses the extra weight.

But Viagra is good too. My husband needs to use it and while there are some side effects, they are not severe and are temporary. Viagra works very well and we are both thankful for it. Sex used to be very stressful and now there's no worries.

You can try getting your husband some arginine. Its an amino acid with no need for a doctor visit (although he may want to check with his doctor to make sure there isn't any contraindication like him being on coumadin). I've read on another message board that a lot of the men were having great results with it. It helps with firmer erections and men have found that they start having morning erections again after a long hiatus. Your husband need not be completely impotent to see the benefits.

Check out this article:

altmedicine.about.com/cs/conditionsetoh/a/erectiledysfunc.htm

Thats why body builders are always horny. Then incorporate Zanes diet with aminos and sky is the limit. I'm 50 and ready all the time. My wife loves it.

Thanks for the guidance, everyone. I think I will study the diet and pass it along to my husband. I think he'd be open to trying it. I just have to walk a fine line, in that I don't want to exacerbate his insecurities by "pushing" him to improve his erections. He is already aware that it is somewhat of a problem.

Thanks again!

Now you know what it's like to be a male with a high libido! Sexual fantasies around the clock. Nothing unusual at all. We men deal with it all the time. What's important is what you do with them, not that you have them.

See if you can't figure out a way to focus your fantasies back on your husband. Would it help if he tried some new ways of having sex, or different settings, or even role play of some sort? It sounds to me like you want some more variety and excitement within the marriage. Would it help if your sex life with your husband was so varied and rich that most of what you heard about other people's sex lives sounded dull by comparison? Would that reduce your desire and curiosity to be with another man?