His and Her Health

Post Deleted.

I am going to try to say this tactfully, since it seems like you are sincere and caring and concerned.

Please try to look at this from her point of view. She is 54. She has never had what SHE considers to be an orgasm. It doesn't seem that sex is gratifying or enjoyable to her (I could be wrong about this, but I suspect not). And yet, out of love for you, she accommodates you sexually three times a week. Consider that it may be something she does as a service for the sake of the marriage - like you may mow the lawn or fix the plumbing - not something you particularly enjoy but are content to put up with because it makes home life smooth. I think that after 26 years of it, I'd be inventing long periods too.

You want her to overcome whatever it is that's keeping her from enjoying sex. This is great and wonderful and right, but please be sure that your concern is for her benefit as well as yours. I am SURE you sincerely want her to enjoy sex for her sake, but how much of your concern is also fear it might be the only way to keep her from gradually eliminating access to her vagina? Where was this concern when she was 34 or 44?

Respectfully, comments like "no sex allowed" "I like it three times a week" and "no sex for me one week in four" and "I'm forced to use lubricant" make it sound like your main concern is for yourself.

I hope you take this constructively. I'm not trying to bash you. I'm just trying to shake up your viewpoint a little bit and take another possible view. I'm a stranger who doesn't know you, so I could be entirely wrong, but you asked for advice. The answer to your last question is "yes."

A little bashing is ok, guy shows up here like he is straight out of a Viagra ad. Hey horndog, try listening to your wife a little more and worrying about your 30 minutes of fame a little less. If she is making up stories to throw you off, there is obviously a deeper problem. Maybe approach her about it from a position of say, worrying about what she is feeling?

Leo62,your wife may be perimenopausal. Some of the symptoms are there. Perhaps a visit to another GYN for a change in the estrogen cream might help. Here is a link to our companion website www.redhotmamas.org and one of our sites www.menopausewise.com they both have good information you both can read.